Talk sober
Talk to your loved one sober. It may seem as if he or she is always inebriated or high, but there has to be an occasional time when your loved one is sober and that is the time to talk to him.
Many users are the most clear-headed first thing in the morning. Catch him when he first wakes up and before he gets that first hit of the day.
Stay cool
It is easy to lose your temper when trying to talk to a user. They have a way of infuriating even the most patient people. Go into your discussion with a calm and clear head and be determined to be patient and to not explode, despite your frustrations.
He/she will likely lose his cool, but don’t take the bait. Tell him that you didn’t approach him to have an argument and that you want to discuss the situation like adults.
Resist judgment
The temptation to be judgmental when you see someone sliding downhill will be strong. The urge to lecture him about how to shape up will be tough to resist. Being too harsh won’t help, though. It will only drive him further into his addiction. Be honest without using judgment.
Remember that they have a disease and that, while his initial choices led him down this path, it is now very difficult for him to give up his habit.
Honest emotions
Be honest about your emotions. Users often don’t realize just how much their actions impact those around them. Tell your loved one in a simple and straightforward way how his actions make you feel.
Sometimes the loved ones of those struggling with addiction want to act stronger than they feel. Trying to protect him from the pain he is causing you is helping no one. Be calm when you tell him and maintain empathy, but don’t hold back.
Consider intervention
When you have given communication your all and your efforts continue to fail to bring about any changes or productive responses in your loved one, it may be time to turn to a professional for help.
An intervention is a gathering of family and friends to confront someone with an addiction and to give him options for getting help. There are professionals who are experienced in organizing and leading these events.
When you have been unable to talk to him/her with any success, he may need several people to get the message across.
