As we head into 2024, I think it is more important to be aware every single day that we are all dealing with something. We need to be gentle with ourselves. At any stage of life, make this the year of you.
Celebrate the every day, the “small stuff.” This circles back to using the good stuff. Don’t save the best for last — or never. Whether it’s a scented candle, bath bomb, great chocolate, the good china or sipping a hot tea on the “good” sofa — you and your loved ones are “worth it.”
Resolutions run rampant this time of year. Instead of focusing on appearance alone, let’s focus on how we FEEL. Don’t let your health fall off the priority list. This is more than weight loss. This is about sleep. Nutrition. Hydration.
My people will tell you that my answer to just about every ailment or ill one might have is “have you had enough water?” Proper hydration is so important and the majority are walking around dehydrated. I don’t want to hear that you “don’t like” water. You’re an adult. Deal with it. Add a lemon or something. No, coffee, tea and soda do not count. Period.
Don’t compare yourself to others. Whether real life, television, celebrities or online, things are rarely what they seem. No one lives a “perfect” life. Most homes have that messy corner, closet or dirty laundry. Most relationships and people do too.
Stick to your boundaries. Good boundaries make great relationships. “No” is a complete sentence. You can stick to your own boundaries without being rude or mean. “No.” “No, thank you.” “I have to pass but thanks for the offer.” These are all valid responses. I always say I owe no one an explanation other than my spouse, Mr. Wonderful.
Don’t set yourself up to fail with giant resolutions. Focus on small changes. Read 20 pages a day, and you will read 30 books a year on average. Heck, read 10 pages daily or 20 pages every other day. Fifteen books is no small number.
Walk or stretch a few minutes a day. Yes, minutes. Surely not one of us is too busy to set aside two minutes to stretch? Maybe go for five on the weekends. Even if all you do is walk to the mailbox, if it’s more than you did previously — that’s progress.
Want to get your space in order? Decluttering one room per week will finish the average home in just a few months. If you can’t start with a room, then start with a drawer. Less IS more. Donate what you aren’t using. Allow you — and your home — space to breathe.
Remember that time waits for no one and change is inevitable.
Engage in the world. Even as an introvert who needs ample “downtime,” I can attest that friendships are the lifeblood of existence. They truly make life worth living. Be an inviter. Have people over even if your home isn’t “perfect.” Welcome people to know the real you in your “every day.” Join a club. We started a book club that became a cake club (according to our adult offspring). We’ve now settled on “club.” Activities may vary, but it’s always a great time.
On that note, work on being a good listener. As a storyTELLER, I’m a work in progress on this one. Offer to stop what you are doing. Make eye contact. Stop talking. Just listen. Pour a cup of coffee or tea or the all-important glass of water. Ask, “do you want my advice or are you just bouncing some ideas right now?” Listen carefully to the answer.
Call, text or write to your friends. It doesn’t have to be a novel or even important. Share the “crazy thing that happened” or “this made me smile and think of you.” Show you care. Make it weird. I have a dear friend who is mega busy and important. Like she’s CEO of a major business. She still takes time to send handwritten cards and notes. I keep them in a drawer by my bed. They mean THAT much to me. If you can’t find a stamp, send a text.
Look for the “glimmer” in your days. A glimmer is the opposite of a “trigger.” They are little moments of awe, nostalgia or feelings of hope and joy that make life that much sweeter. It may be sight, smell or taste. Romanticize your life. Seek comfort. Seek self-care.
Remember as we age that none of us know when “midlife” really is/was. Plan for longevity but live for the now as well. Life stages and resolutions are a rebrand. You’re still you. But better.
